groom’s wedding day countdown

Pick up some brownie points by knowing exactly what you should be doing and when!

One year before...

• Decide on a budget and then try to stick to it when the bride gets carried away
• Book a reception and ceremony venue – easier said than done, this might involve endless drives around the country to find the perfect venue

Nine months before...

• Help bride decide guest list – think about it this way: if you’re involved now you’ll know when the bride starts expanding the guest list (and your budget!) later on, so pay attention
• Investigate the ultimate reward for all this hard work: your honeymoon
• Begin thinking about outfits for you, the best man and ushers – even if you’re known for your ‘individual sense of style’, definitely co-ordinate with the bride on this one; you’re not allowed to attract more attention than her!

Six months before...

• Book transport to the ceremony and reception for the whole wedding party – you might even enjoy this one, especially if you go for a few test drives in the name of research
• Finalise honeymoon plans, look out passports and start paying for it
• Order buttonholes for the men in the wedding party; explain what a ‘buttonhole’ is to any confused males.
• Look into accommodation for guests
• Book your own accommodation for the first night, after checking that it’s not part of your wedding package already.
• Try to get a definite number for the daytime and evening guest list
• Order the wedding rings – don’t suggest buying them from Ratners, this is one purchase that’s supposed to be romantic
• Order your outfits and start trying to lose that beer gut so you don’t show up your beautiful bride

Three months before...

• Choose items and/or vouchers for your gift list; don’t worry, this is not like normal shopping, it’s more fun – at Debenhams they give you a laser gun and you prowl the shop scanning all the things you like.
• Have fittings for your outfits, try not to giggle when they measure your inside leg.
• Make sure your best man has the stag do organised - don't believe, 'Yeah it's all sorted, don't worry mate,' until you see evidence of concrete plans.
• Start writing your speech. Don't buy a sample speech off the internet and fill in the blanks - women can smell insincerity you know.

One month before...

• Buy wedding gifts for your bride and the attendants; it is traditional to buy her a gift, no matter how much you’ve already spent on the wedding.
• Pick up the wedding rings, make sure they fit and guard them with your life.
• Make sure all legal documents are in order – note that this area falls firmly into the realms of your responsibilities.
• Confirm honeymoon arrangements. Prove what a thoughtful husband you will be by arranging to have the honeymoon suite filled with champagne, strawberries and your bride’s favourite flowers (ask her sister/bridesmaid!)
• Make appointments to get yourself spruced up just before the wedding – nose hair and wedding photos do not mix.
• Confirm with all the suppliers – imagine a wedding without music, or a cake, or someone to marry you…

One week before...

• Pick up outfits and check you have all the necessary accessories; cufflinks, kilt socks, full hip flask in case she’s really late.
• Pack for going away and help the bride with all those delightful last-minute tasks such as assembling favours’ boxes and picking up her relatives from the airport – if you have the choice, go for the latter.
• Make sure the ushers know what to do on the day; ask Google rather than a preoccupied bride-to-be if you’re not sure.
• Get spending money together for the honeymoon – yes you must pay for that too. Never mind, at least you put spanking new luggage on the gift list…
• Make yourself look nice with a haircut, you could even push the boat out and get a facial and manicure if you’re comfortable being a modern man.

On the big day

• Compliment the bride and the bridesmaids; whatever her sister looks like in that tight orange number, it's a cardinal sin not to do so.
• Congratulate yourself on being such a great groom and not having a hangover, and enjoy your day.